Alone
by S.J. Kohl
Summary: Satoshi's in love with Daisuke, but what happens when Daisuke falls for his alterego? Postseries. Yaoi. DarkxDaisuke, SatoshixDaisuke, eventual M rating.
1. Ch 1: Expected Unexpected

Alone  
By S.J. Kohl

Characters: Satoshi, Daisuke  
Rating: PG  
Summary: Daisuke needs Satoshi's advice. Set after the ending of the anime.

Disclaimer: I don't own Daisuke; Dark's not mine, and Satoshi probably wouldn't want anything to do with me…

Satoshi blinked blearily in the haze of early morning. It wasn't even fully light out, and someone was calling him already? Who could possibly want to get in touch with him that badly? No one ever called him anymore. _Even the police leave me alone now that Dark's disappeared. _Sighing, Satoshi rolled over and picked up the phone, warily placing the receiver against his ear. "Hello?"

"Hi-Hiwatari?"

Satoshi narrowed his eyes in startled confusion. _Daisuke. _It was Daisuke's voice; he could tell that even through the low, choking rasp of stifled sobs. "It's me, Daisuke."

"I…shouldn't have called…" The voice was soft and almost indiscernible through the buzz of the phone line.

"No," Satoshi shook his head slowly. "It's fine. It's good to hear a familiar voice every once in a while. I haven't seen anyone since…"

"You left." Daisuke threw out almost accusingly. "You promised you'd stay, and then you left me alone."

"Not alone. You have…" Satoshi trailed off as the rough voice and muffled tears finally registered in his mind. Why was Daisuke crying?

"I have Riku? She broke up with me, Hiwatari."

"…when?" _Not why? _Satoshi shook his head. He knew why. He'd been expecting this, had been both desiring and dreading this day for months.

"Last night. She told me I didn't love her. That I might _like _her, but I could never love her."

Satoshi sighed and ran a hand through his bed-rumpled hair. Slowly, he forced out the questions he knew Daisuke needed to hear. "Did she say why she thought that?"

"She said…she said I'm in love with Dark."

Satoshi lifted an eyebrow. Riku wasn't one to waste words, was she? He might have chosen to lay things out a bit more tactfully, but…it _did _get the point across. "And?"

A long pause on Daisuke's end. "And what?"

"What do you think, Daisuke?"

"I think…" Satoshi could almost hear Daisuke licking his lips in contemplation. "I miss him. And I want him back. I never thought I'd want him back, Hiwatari, but I do."

Satoshi bit down hard on the response he wanted to make. Daisuke needed a friend right now, not a critic. "I know."

"Do you…miss Krad?"

_Not like you miss Dark. _Satoshi blinked against the burning in his eyes. _Of course I miss Krad. He's a part of me, and I don't feel complete without him. But I know the world's better off with him out of it. But Dark…it's not the same with Dark. _"Yes."

"I can't stop thinking about him. I keep wondering…"

"What?"

"…if there's any way to break that seal."

"You can't break the seal, Daisuke. And even if you had the power, I wouldn't let you."

Venom spiked in Daisuke's voice. "Why not? I _need _him, Hiwatari. I feel ripped in half without him."

"I know." _Too well, too well. _"But you can't break the seal, Dai. You can't let Krad back out."

"But…"

"Look," Satoshi almost snarled. "You haven't lost Dark. Now that you've ended things with Riku, Dark's going to come back. He's just waiting for you to let him in."

"But…how?"

Satoshi closed his eyes. He could hear the longing, the fragile hope in Daisuke Niwa's voice, and he hated that hope. He'd been waiting for Daisuke to call him about this, had known it would happen, sooner or later. And he'd known, too, just what it was Daisuke felt for Dark. _A love too consuming to truly allow anyone else inside. _Satoshi Hiwatari would never be a part of Daisuke's life. He didn't have to worry anymore about Daisuke enacting his change into Krad, so it wasn't dangerous for him to be around the boy, but…he couldn't stand to be close to Daisuke knowing Daisuke would never feel for him the things he felt for a man who didn't really exist.

So he'd left, hardening his heart against the day Daisuke would call to tell him Riku had had enough. He'd known she would do it too, that she would see the lingering connection between Daisuke and Dark, even if Daisuke didn't. Satoshi stirred suddenly, standing up and walking to a small window looking out on a crowded city street.

"Hiwatari?"

Satoshi blinked. "The feather. The black feather. Dark isn't trapped behind the seal like Krad is. That feather is his link to the world. To you. He just needs you to invite him back."

A long silence. "How do I do that?"

Satoshi clenched his fist tightly against the pain welling within him. "Do you love Riku?"

"…"

"Answer the question."

A sigh. "No."

"So who's your Sacred Maiden?"

"What?"

Satoshi growled. Daisuke _still _didn't understand. _Don't make me say it. Don't make me tell you… _"You don't love Riku, so she doesn't enact the change. Change once, just once, and Dark will be back with you. But who's your Sacred Maiden, Daisuke?"

"I don't…I can't…Hiwatari?"

"Not me, Daisuke. You don't love _me._" He deliberately misunderstood, needing to feel the pain Daisuke's response would bring him.

"No!" Daisuke exclaimed, bewildered distaste coloring his voice scarlet.

"No." Satoshi paused. _Come on, Daisuke. Figure it out. I'm not giving you the answer. If I'm going to lose my last chance with you, it's going to be on your terms, not mine. _"But you _do _love someone."

"I don't…I love…?" Satoshi felt it the moment it hit, a rolling, crashing wave of shock and realization. "It's Dark. I love Dark…" Daisuke lapsed into silence.

Satoshi gripped the windowsill with quiet desperation. Now. This was the moment of his damnation. _No. _He braced himself for what he knew would happen next.

"Master Satoshi." Dark's voice, deep with a rugged edge of ever-present irony. "Thanks."

"Sure…"

"No, really." Dark hesitated. "Look, I know…"

"No, it's fine. Really. It's better this way." He knew how this bond worked, knew that Daisuke could hear and see everything that was happening. And he didn't want Daisuke to know. "But…don't worry about Krad. Risa has a feather, but it isn't a real one. Not anymore. He can't get out like you did. And…as long as you're Daisuke's Sacred…Maiden…you won't disappear."

"Yeah, it's a nice little loophole, isn't it? Master Satoshi…" Dark hesitated.

"Yes…Master Dark?"

"Don't stay away. I…we both miss you."

Pulling the receiver away from his ear numbly, Satoshi clicked the off button and set the phone on the windowsill. He felt drained. And…restless. Somehow, after all this time spent waiting for Riku to make her move, waiting for Dark to come back, this confrontation felt empty…anticlimactic. It had been inevitable. He knew--had always known--how Daisuke felt about Dark. And how Dark felt about Daisuke. And he'd always known, too, that no matter how much he loved Daisuke, he would never try to come between them.

Because, if by some miracle he succeeded and captured Daisuke's Niwa's attention, Dark would disappear. Satoshi refused to be responsible for taking Dark out of the world. Not like that. And so he'd been doomed from the beginning.

Shrugging his shoulders, Satoshi Hiwatari made his way to his small closet, pulling out his clothes for the day. Now that it was over, he felt truly alone. Daisuke had Dark back, and Dark had the world. And Satoshi…had only himself to blame. He sighed. Maybe Dark was right.

Maybe it _was _time to go home.


	2. Ch 2: Unanswered Questions

Alone  
Part Two  
Satoshi, Dark/Daisuke  
PG  
A/N: A short chapter, but a chapter nonetheless...

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Satoshi cried.

It had been a long time since he'd been home. So many things had changed. Risa was gone; she'd left to go to college across the Pacific just after graduation. Riku had left after her breakup with Daisuke.

_Daisuke… _He would be eighteen now. Satoshi hadn't seen Daisuke in more than four years, hadn't heard his voice since that…phone conversation a few weeks before.

But he could see Daisuke now, grinning and talking to himself—to Dark—as he lay back on the ground, cradled in the roots of a cherry tree. He looked happy. He was bigger, still slender but taller. Grown. His eyes were as bright as they'd always been, his cheeks still stained with the same blush. _Dark must have said something interesting. _His voice was deeper now, but it still held the same unusual, slightly hysterical edge to it. It was still unique, still Daisuke.

Satoshi grimaced, melting back into the shadows, taking care to remain hidden. He didn't want to be seen, didn't want to see…

And yet he couldn't leave. He could only stand there, grafted to the shadows of the trees at the edge of the park, staring out into the field at the lone cherry tree, with its near-white blossoms and the red-headed burden supported carefully against it. Daisuke's laugh ripped against the wind, and Satoshi shivered, feeling the old whispers of an inner voice struggling to come into the light. A useless effort. Krad was trapped, unable to break free no matter what Satoshi's feelings for Daisuke might be. _Maybe I was wrong. Some things don't change, even if you cross the world to escape. _

_Four years. _

No. There was no escape.

With one last glance at Daisuke, Satoshi ruthlessly scrubbed the tears from his cheeks and turned his back on the cherry tree and the park.

He would greet Daisuke later.

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_:Hiwatari's back.:_

"What?" Daisuke blinked, sitting up abruptly, his back twingeing sharply in protest.

_:Hiwatari. He's back.:_

"Oh." Daisuke shook his head and leaned back against the tree's slender trunk. "How do you know?"

_:He was standing just over there, in the grove lining the street.:_

"Hey!" Daisuke glared at Dark. Well, he couldn't glare _at _Dark per say, but he glared nonetheless, rolling his eyes upward and knowing his counterpart would get the message. "Why didn't you tell me?"

A mental shrug. _:If he was ready to see us, he would've come over here.:_

"What do you mean if he was ready? Why wouldn't he want to see us? He's been gone for four years! I…" Daisuke hesitated, confusion shivering within him.

_:You what, Dai?:_

Daisuke shrugged. "I've missed him."

A sardonic laugh. _:I'm sure he's missed you too.:_

"Then why didn't he come over here?"

_:You really don't see much beyond yourself, do you?:_

Daisuke sighed impatiently, wondering idly why it was he'd brought Dark back again anyway. "I do too. I just don't get why he'd do something like that. I mean…Hiwatari's a friend. Or he _was._"

A sigh. _:He just needs some time to himself is all. It's a big change, coming back here after four years. He'll come around when he's ready, don't worry.:_

Daisuke nodded, his red eyes growing dark. He leaned forward, toying with a blade of grass. He cleared his throat. "…Hey, Dark?"

A soft breath. _:Yeah?:_

Daisuke licked his lips. "Can you tell me why Satoshi left?"


	3. Ch 3: Regrets

Alone  
Part Three: Regrets  
By S.J. Kohl  
PG

He was a ripple, nothing more than a whisper in the mind of an eighteen year-old boy. Dark sighed, an imagined sigh, as all his movements were imagined these days. Still, it was more than he'd been before. _Trapped on the edge of existence, able to feel Daisuke on the other side but unable to reach him, unable to do anything at all. Couldn't die. Couldn't live. _A sharp sliver of pain sliced through Dark's being.

He could see the world now. He could live and laugh and worry. He could even take control, could feel true life flood his limbs. He could look into a mirror and see his own face staring back at him if he wished.

Sometimes he did. Daisuke would switch places with him, would fade to the back of his own mind and allow Dark to take over for a while. Dark didn't do that often though; most of the time he was content to remain in the background, surrounded by the prickly warmth of Daisuke's presence, viewing the world through younger eyes. True, their bodies were the same age now, Daisuke being less than half a year from his nineteenth birthday. But their minds…Dark had been shifting in and out of corporeal existence for more than 300 years. He might have become a bit…jaded.

And at times like these—"Can you tell me why Satoshi left?"—he could half-wish to flicker back into the almost-world he'd inhabited for the last four years, the sealed-away darkness he'd shared with his brother. Almost. He wouldn't have to answer then, wouldn't have to tell Daisuke what was really going on and risk losing everything he'd managed to finally build. This was the first chance he'd ever had, after all, of actually having a real life. Love, happiness, family, fulfillment—he'd never had those before. And the only woman he'd ever loved… _Rika. _Dark swallowed down a flicker of pain. He hadn't been able to be with her. He'd only lived in snapshots. He'd only had brief moments—weeks, months, sometimes a few years—of a life that wasn't really his before he'd had to return to the black void of waiting, waiting for another son to be born, to grow up.

But now he had Daisuke. And Daisuke loved him. Dark was quickly coming to realize, enveloped in Daisuke's warm mind as he was, that Daisuke's love was worth living for. Daisuke was loyal and giving, if a bit nervous.

Things were already different between them. There weren't many arguments, for one thing. There was no Risa to battle over, after all, and no Riku. And he was back this time by Daisuke's choice, not by force or some accident of genetics. That had made things easier on both of them. As easygoing as Daisuke was, it had still bothered him before to have to share his life and his body with a complete stranger. Dark snickered. _Especially a complete stranger who was trying to steal his little girlfriend. _He hadn't been able to help it though; she'd been so much like Rika.

Still…in the end, Risa was Risa. She wasn't Rika, and it wouldn't have been fair to her—or to himself—to pretend otherwise. Especially since he couldn't exactly have any kind of relationship or marriage without a true body of his own.

Dark smiled. Except this one. Things were indeed different now. He could stay. He wouldn't disappear again, as long as Daisuke continued to love him. Sure, falling in love with another guy had never really been on his things-to-do list, but what could you do? If it happened, it happened. Why fight it? And it had happened. Dark hadn't been able to help falling in love with Daisuke, really falling in love with him, over the past couple of months. Daisuke had changed since he'd admitted what he felt for Dark. Dark had loved him before—had always loved him. But now…now he could really admit that he'd fallen in love with a skinny, red-headed brat with a squeaky voice. A brat with amazing talent and a strong dose of courage and determination. _Even if he is a little dense most of the time. _

Dark sighed. Those thoughts brought him right back to the original problem. What was he supposed to do? He couldn't lie to Daisuke. He shifted a little inside the boy's mind. _:Dai…I do know why Hiwatari left.:_

"So why did he?" Daisuke asked, his voice low and his eyes closed.

_:I can't tell you that.: _Dark shook his head, unable to suppress a surge of sorrow and regret.

"Why not?" Daisuke was confused and hurt. Why was Dark keeping secrets from him?

_:No secrets, Dai. I just…it's not my place. It's Hiwatari's business, and if you want to know, you need to ask him.:_

"How do _you_ know then?"

Dark laughed. _:'Cause I'm a lot more observant than you are, shrimp. If you'd open your eyes every once in a while you might just figure it out on your own.:_

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean? I'm not stupid!"

_:Of course you're not stupid. I don't flirt with stupid people.: _Dark shook his head. Daisuke really was dense. It was so easy to get him to change the subject, especially when the original topic was a question he wasn't really sure he wanted the answer to anyway.

Daisuke blushed, ducking his head lower. "You flirt with me?"

Dark could have smacked him. _:Who else would I flirt with these days? You practically strangle me if I even _look _at a girl when I'm out and about.:_

Daisuke's eyes went wide. "I do not!"

_:You do.: _Dark chuckled wryly. _:But you know what?:_

"Huh?"

_:I kinda like it. You get all flustered and huffy, and you know what else, Dai?:_

"Wh-what?" Daisuke asked, his cheeks now a brilliant scarlet.

_:One day I'm going to be able to really kiss you…somehow. I bet you'll really get huffy then.:_

"Dark!"

_:You don't want to kiss me?:_

"No! I-I mean, yes…I…umm…" Finally, Daisuke just shrugged, a coil of frustration whispering across his mind. "What does it matter? We can't do it anyway."

_:I know.: _Dark's smile faded. He couldn't help but wonder if, somewhere, Satoshi Hiwatari was thinking the exact same thing.

---------------------------------------

Daisuke let out a long breath and curled up under the covers of his bed. It had been a long day, and he was alone in his mind, something that didn't happen very often anymore. _Dark must be asleep already. _It was strange, the emptiness he felt when Dark's conscious presence faded away into sleep. When he'd first turned fourteen, he hadn't thought he'd ever get used to having someone else in his head all the time, but now…

Dark's presence was comforting. He could feel Dark inside of him; sometimes he could even feel what Dark was feeling or know what he was thinking. They could communicate with so much more than words, and Daisuke _knew_, though Dark had never said it, that Dark loved him. Dark had always loved him. There was something reassuring in that.

It was strange too, because Daisuke knew he'd loved Riku. In a way. She'd been very important to him; she still was. But there'd always been some wall between them, some kind of distance he couldn't cross. He'd enjoyed kissing her, but he'd never really been able to make himself move beyond that. He'd thought for a while that it was honor. Decency. So he'd asked her to marry him.

And that was when she'd left.

"_Touch me, Daisuke."_

"_What?"_

"_Touch me."_

_Nervously, his mind a maelstrom of confusion, Daisuke settled his hands on Riku's hips, drawing her against him. _

_She shook her head. "No." Her brown eyes wet with tears, she looked up at him. "I mean touch me. Kiss me. Take me to bed."_

_Daisuke's eyes went wide. His fingers—one hand gripping a simple silver ring capped with a small, circular diamond—trembled against her hips. "But…we're not…I just asked…"_

"_I know what you asked, Daisuke. But before I say yes, I need to know something."_

"_What?"_

"_Do you love me, Daisuke Niwa?"_

"_Of course!"_

_Riku's eyes were hard. "Then touch me."_

_Daisuke fidgeted. He leaned down and sealed his lips to hers, sweat prickling against the back of his neck. Her fingers closed over his, drawing his hand up, up, up her body to settle against one small, high breast. Daisuke pulled back, his eyes wide and startled. "Riku?"_

_She shook her head. "Four years, Daisuke. And you can't even touch me, can barely kiss me. You know what I think?"_

_Daisuke didn't answer, he just held out his hand, silently pleading for…something. He didn't know what._

"_I think you don't like girls, Niwa. You're not in love with me. You like me I know, but we should never have been more than friends…maybe then you would have realized it sooner."_

"…_realized what?" Daisuke's voice was hardly more than a whisper._

_She laughed, a soft, sad laugh. "You're in love with a ghost. With Dark Mousy." She kissed him then. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders in a gentle embrace and pressed her lips to his. When she finally pulled back, she slipped something from her pocket and closed his fingers around it. "Goodbye, Niwa. Be happy."_

_With that, Riku left._

_Numb and shattered, Daisuke stared down at his hand. In his open palm were two things: the engagement ring and one soft, familiar black feather. _

It hadn't been that long ago. Such a short time since the end of that relationship and the beginning of this one. But things with Dark just felt so…natural. _Maybe Riku was right. Maybe I _don't_ like girls. Or maybe…_ Maybe it was just Dark.

Daisuke closed his eyes. He couldn't help feeling guilty. She'd loved _him, _after all. Why hadn't he been able to love her back? And even so, why hadn't he realized it from the beginning? Then he wouldn't have taken four years of her life away from her. It wasn't fair to her. And…he felt happy now. With Dark. _I wonder… _

Daisuke shook his head as an image of Hiwatari drifted to the surface of his mind. What had Dark meant when he'd said Daisuke might know why Hiwatari left if he'd just pay attention? He paid attention! It wasn't like he was stumbling around with his eyes closed or anything, and Hiwatari had…after Dark left, Hiwatari had just…disappeared. He hadn't said anything. One day he was just…gone.

It had hurt. Daisuke never realized how much he cared about Satoshi until he wasn't there anymore. He hadn't even left a way to get in touch with him. No address, no phone number, not even an email address. Getting his phone number after Riku'd left had been hell. _I wonder…_

Daisuke yawned. His mind drifted as sleep began to draw him in. _I wonder…is he happy? _


	4. Ch 4: Intrusion

Alone  
Part Four: Intrusions  
By S.J. Kohl

Pairings: Dark/Daisuke, Satoshi…possible future Satoshi pairings as well.  
Rating: PG, eventual M rating, I swear!

Disclaimer: These boys aren't mine. I go for girls…or at least, one girl! blinks at Phoenix  
A/N: This story was originally meant to be a one-shot, and the further I get into it now…the more I realize the title needs to be changed!

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Satoshi Hiwatari smiled. It was small smile, a slightly sarcastic smile as he closed his eyes and lifted his face to the sun, but it was a smile nonetheless. His first in a long, long time. It felt good to be back home. He'd found an apartment in the city, an apartment that was, incidentally, not too far from where Daisuke was living these days. It had been easy transferring his business back here. He was private investigator now, after all, working on his own on cases that interested him. It was better this way. He got to choose which cases he would accept or reject; he didn't have to work with local police or federal agents, and he didn't have to see his father except on his own terms and under his own conditions.

It was definitely better this way, in this place where he could sit outside in the grass and smile up into the face of the sun. He could live here, close to Daisuke, close to…

"Hiwatari?"

Satoshi blinked and turned his head. His smile slowly faded. "Dark."

Shrugging slightly, Dark dropped down onto the grass beside Satoshi, leaning back on his elbows and crossing one leg casually over the other. "Since you're sitting out in front of my apartment, I kinda get the feeling you wanted to talk to me."

Satoshi shot Dark a sidelong glance. "And how do you know I didn't want to talk to Daisuke?"

"Easy," Dark grinned. "You woulda knocked on the door."

"Ah," Satoshi sighed. He sat in silence for a moment, wondering if he even wanted to voice his reasons for coming by here. Dark was…Dark, after all. He'd spent too many years trying to kill Dark Mousy to not feel strange having a chat with him at the park. Perhaps he should go. Satoshi looked over at Dark again. He looked…different. Almost serious. He didn't have that same brash, cocky confidence lingering around his eyes anymore. Satoshi shifted slightly. "Daisuke…"

"Is sleeping."

Satoshi cocked an eyebrow. "At two in the afternoon?"

"He pulled an all-nighter trying to finish this paper he had due today, crashed as soon as his class was over this morning. I, on the other hand, am not sleepy."

"You guys can do that, sleep at different times?"

"Sure," Dark shrugged. "As long as I don't poke him real hard or anything. Brat sleeps like a log. I could jump off a cliff without using my wings and he wouldn't wake up now. Anyway, point is he isn't listening, so say whatever you want."

Satoshi frowned slightly. Krad had always been able to remain awake while _he _slept, but it had never worked the other way around. He dismissed the thought. It wasn't important right now. He looked at Dark, catching the feral interest in the man's dark purple eyes. "I wanted to tell you that I'm back."

"I know."

"No, I mean…for good. I'm not leaving anymore."

Dark nodded slowly. "That's…kinda what I figured." He sat up. "I never expected you to leave, Hiwatari. You were friends with Daisuke before I ever entered the picture."

"But…"

"I know. You're in love with him. That doesn't mean you shouldn't hang around. Besides…" He cocked an eyebrow. "It would be pretty stupid of me to get pissed at you. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't even be here right now."

Satoshi shrugged, dropping his eyes. "I just did what was right."

"Yeah…" Dark moved closer, dropping one hand softly onto Satoshi's still slim shoulder. "Hiwatari?"

Satoshi almost flinched against the contact, but he forced his body to relax. Dark didn't mean any harm. For once. "Yes, Dark?"

"I think…if I hadn't come into the picture, Daisuke could have been happy with you."

A long silence spun out between them. Finally, Satoshi pulled away, laying back in the grass to stare up at the unrelenting blue of the afternoon sky. "It doesn't matter, does it? You _did _come into the picture."

Dark didn't miss the bitterness that swam beneath the surface of Satoshi Hiwatari's soft voice. "Yeah…and sometimes I think it would have been better if I hadn't. Better for Daisuke, I mean."

Satoshi looked over at Dark, curious despite himself. "Better how?"

"I'm not exactly real, Hiwatari."

Satoshi laughed. "You're as real as I am now, Dark. You were called into this world, and now you're a part of it. You belong here. No one can change that."

"Yeah but…Daisuke and I share a body. We can't exactly be together, not like real couples."

"Not even in dreams?"

Dark shook his head, his eyes dark with regret. "We're two different people. Our dreams are our own."

This time it was Satoshi who reached out. He stretched out his arm, catching one of Dark's hands and lacing their fingers together. He squeezed gently. "I'm sorry."

Dark shrugged, squeezing back lightly. "He says he doesn't need it, anything physical. We're closer than any two normal people could possibly be, and that's enough for him, but…"

"That doesn't stop you from wanting it."

"Nope." Dark laughed then, a low, bitter laugh. He held up their joined hands. "We can't even do this, Hiwatari."

"But?"

"Ah, there's always a but, isn't there? Well, _but _I'm happy. I love the little brat. He's good for me."

"I noticed." Satoshi smiled. "You're not nearly as much of a jerk as you used to be."

"Me?" Dark looked over at Satoshi, his eyes wide and innocent. "A jerk? I would never."

"And that time you kissed Risa when you _knew _Daisuke was well aware of what you were doing was…what?"

Dark wrinkled his nose. "Eh, so you have a point. What's the big deal? He paid me back by ignoring me for three months straight, which is _not _easy to do when you're sharing the same body."

"I can imagine. Hey, Dark…" Satoshi hesitated for a second. Drawing back his hand, he sat up again and turned to face Dark fully. "There's something else I wanted to talk to you about."

"Sure," Dark dropped his grin, his eyes intense and almost black in the afternoon sunlight. "What is it, Hiwatari?"

"I've…been wanting to tell you this for a long time. Didn't know if I'd ever really get the chance, but now, well…"

"Shit!" Dark's eyes flew wide. "Dai's waking up, and he's…I got to go!" He rose to his feet in one smooth motion. He looked down at Satoshi. "I guess we'll have to finish this later, huh?"

"No," Satoshi shook his head, his heart aching as he made a decision. "Don't leave. I want to see him."

"You sure?"

Slowly, Satoshi nodded and rose to his feet, not bothering to brush the dirt from his pants. "I'm sure."

"All right," Dark grinned. "But I have to warn you, he's pretty grumpy when he first wakes up."

Then Dark closed his eyes, and the violet of his hair began to bleed a vibrant red.


	5. Ch 5: Why?

Alone  
Part Five: Why?  
PG  
A/N: Another short chapter. This story seems to be mostly a collection of interesting conversations, thus far. But I swear it's going somewhere. Really.

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Yawning widely, Daisuke stretched his arms up over his head and fell back onto his pillow. Or he tried to anyway. Snapping his eyes open, he rubbed his head and glared up at the innocent blue of the sky. He was outside. Lying on the hard ground instead of in his soft bed. _Daaaark, what would you leave me out here for? _

Dark didn't answer.

Muttering softly to himself, Daisuke sat up. Then he blinked. "Hi-Hiwatari?"

A slow smile spread across Satoshi Hiwatari's face, and he pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose. "Long time no see, Daisuke. I guess you've finally stopped screeching when people accuse you of liking other boys, huh?"

"Hiwatari!" Daisuke's eyes went wide. "You…you knew I liked…that I didn't…"

"Of course," Satoshi chuckled. "There was a time everyone thought you wanted me, after all."

Daisuke's cheeks brightened to a piercing scarlet. "I _never…_"

"I know. But they didn't know that, now did they?"

Daisuke blinked again. Was that anger or sadness that flashed across Hiwatari's face just then? He couldn't tell. Daisuke cleared his throat. "Uh…well. I guess you're right anyway. I can't really…argue…"

"Don't worry about it. There's nothing wrong with it."

Daisuke bit his lip. "It doesn't bother you? I was afraid that might have been, you know…why you left."

Satoshi snorted and leaned back on his elbows, staring across the street at the apartment building where Dark and Daisuke made their home. "Because you're gay? You really _are _dense, aren't you?"

"Hey!" Daisuke twisted around, crossing his legs and leaning over to glare down at Hiwatari. "That's not fair! I'm not dense!"

Satoshi cocked an eyebrow and choked down a surge of irritation. _Still such an innocent. _He sighed. "Then you should have noticed how much we have in common."

Daisuke's eyes widened. He leaned further forward. "You mean you're…"

"I like boys, Daisuke." Satoshi smiled into Daisuke's shocked face. "That should have been fairly evident, even when we were fourteen."

"Well…I mean…I always thought you were a little…" Daisuke cleared his throat and leaned back. "I guess I should've guessed."

"Probably. But the fact remains that I didn't leave because I knew you were gay and it made me uncomfortable. Besides…I'm back now. This city really is home, after all."

They sat in silence for a while, Daisuke unconsciously pulling up blades of grass with nervous fingers. Finally, he slid a little closer to Hiwatari. "So…why _did_ you leave?"

Satoshi didn't answer for a long time. He wasn't sure he was _going _to answer at all, but… _If I'm really going to stay…if I'm going to be friends with Daisuke…with Dark…then I have to tell him. _He didn't think Dark would mind. Dark understood, after all. There wasn't anyone who could understand loving Daisuke better than Dark. Satoshi sat up and folded his arms around his knees. He stared at the blank windows of Daisuke's second floor apartment. His voice, when he spoke, was quiet and cool. "I wanted something I couldn't have."

"You wha—" Daisuke bit his lip again as understanding finally washed over him, and his mind flashed back to eighth grade, to Satoshi Hiwatari smiling at him mysteriously from across an empty art room. _"I wanted…to be alone with you." _Daisuke licked his lips. "Hi-Hiwatari?"

Satoshi stood and shrugged his shoulders, smiling softly as he turned to glance back down at Daisuke. "I'll you later, Daisuke." He turned to go, throwing one last look back over his shoulder. "Tell Dark…tell him I said he's still got his hands."

"He's still got his…Hiwatari!" Daisuke shot to his feet, but Satoshi Hiwatari didn't turn around. He just kept walking. Daisuke sighed. _Dark?_

_:Yeah, shrimp?:_

"Don't call me that!" Daisuke glared at the air ahead of him as he made his way back to his tiny apartment. "What did Satoshi mean by 'you've still got your hands?'"

_:Hmm…I don't know.: _Dark shrugged and gave Daisuke a mental ruffle. _:Guess I'll figure it out sometime. That kid never was good at just saying what he meant.:_

"Yeah…" Daisuke blew out a long breath as he trudged up the stairs, pulling the keys out of his pocket where Dark had left them. He popped the lock and stepped inside, shutting the door and sliding down to sit heavily against it. "Dark, I…I don't want Hiwatari to get hurt."

Dark sighed. _:Me either.: _

"Then…what are we going to do?"

Silence. Then, _:I don't think there's anything we _can _do.: _


End file.
